How to live a peaceful life

The ever changing and challenging situations we have to cope with in life are a recipe for increasing anxiety, says Kadam Adam, an international teacher of meditation and Buddhist who is based in Dublin.

The ever changing and challenging situations we have to cope with in life are a recipe for increasing anxiety, says Kadam Adam, an international teacher of meditation and Buddhist who is based in Dublin.

Anxiety is on the increase today. The issue is often described as a "silent epidemic" and Covid-19, in particular, highlighted our vulnerability to it. In the first year of the pandemic, the global prevalence of both anxiety and depression increased by a massive 25 per cent, according to the World Health Organisation.

The unprecedented changes in lifestyle, work, and social situations caused by the pandemic all took a heavy toll on people. While the impact of Covid-19 is no longer keenly felt, anxiety continues to be a problem for many people. Kadam Adam, an international teacher of meditation and Buddhism, who will give a course in the city at the weekend, says high levels of anxiety continue to be a prevalent and significant issue in Ireland and abroad.

"In a 2024 survey by the Irish charity, Aware, it reported that anxiety rates continue to be high in this country, with 17 per cent citing a diagnosis of an anxiety disorder, increasing to one in four (25 per cent ) for those aged 25 to 34. A further eight per cent believe they have an undiagnosed anxiety disorder and 17 per cent say they experience anxiety frequently."

The ever changing and challenging situations we have to cope with in life are a recipe for increasing anxiety, he believes. "Climate change, the 24/7 news cycle, social media, our 'always on' culture, challenges with finding a work-life balance, the spread of regional conflicts, and the potential threat to job security due to the growth of AI can lead to heightened and persistent levels of anxiety, at times, for even the most resilient of us."

He defines anxiety as an unpleasant feeling, an experience of uncontrolled fear. "There are healthy fears we can have, such as the fear we may not be living our very best life. This initial fear can serve as a catalyst for positive change in our lives. It can energise us to embrace those rituals that help us live our best life day by day, such as regular exercise, healthy nutrition, good quality sleep, and meditation.

"However, anxiety [occurs] when our fear gets out of control. For example, let's say our boss schedules a meeting with us, to discuss how we might improve on our current work performance. If we are not mindful, our mind can get caught up catastrophising and imagining all kinds of worse case scenarios, from our boss getting angry with us, to sacking us! The more we ruminate on it, the more our fear intensifies, getting increasingly out of control, and as a result, our anxiety levels increase accordingly.

"In reality, these scenarios may or may not happen. Our boss may think we are doing a great job and simply want to discuss how we can improve, as they think we are a candidate for promotion. When we imagine the worst case scenarios, we both remove ourselves from the present moment and get lost in this uncontrolled fear and anxiety with respect to a merely imagined future."

Kadam Adam says the key to dealing with anxiety in a healthy way, is to learn how to fully accept and be at peace with life's challenges. "We will inevitably meet difficulties, it's just a normal part of life. It's how we respond to them, either with acceptance and peace or aversion and anxiety, that determines the quality of our day, rather than what we meet in our day. This approach will help us cultivate an inner resilience which will enable us to bounce back from adversity and gradually move beyond unhealthy levels of anxiety, over time."

Inner calm

The first step to building resilience is to practice meditation, he suggests. "Give yourself some quality time and space each day to sit and meditate. Maybe we can consider integrating a simple 20 minute meditation practice into our morning routine. We could start with a basic breathing meditation. We sit, turn inwards, learn to focus on our breath as it enters and leaves through the nostrils, instead of the busy thoughts, feelings, and distractions arising at that time.

"In this way, we can calm the busyness, distraction, and anxiety and access an experience of inner calm and peace of mind at the start of each day. When done consistently, this will help us develop and maintain an underlying feeling of inner calm and peace of mind, as well as happiness and wellbeing that arises from that, no matter what's going on in our day."

It will also help create a sense of inner space that gives us the freedom to respond to life's challenges with more wisdom, acceptance and peace, rather than our all too instinctive reactions of aversion and anxiety, he says.

During the day, whenever you notice you are caught up in overthinking, catastrophising, or feeling fearful and anxious, take a breath and pause for a moment, recommends Kadam Adam, who is based at the Tara Kadampa Meditation Centre in Dublin.

Then, identify the main problem, without judging yourself in any way. "For example, your boss may say: 'I would like to meet with you to discuss how you can improve on your work performance.' In such situations, we normally feel we have one problem, the impending meeting. However, whenever we feel we have a problem, we actually have two.

"We have the outer problem, the upcoming meeting. We also have the inner problem, the disturbing feelings of fear and anxiety arising in our mind as a result of it. This inner problem is our main problem. This is the one we need to deal with first, to more effectively deal with the outer problem, the meeting.

"For example, if we can approach that meeting and are able to maintain a calm, peaceful state of mind during it, would we feel we have a problem? Also, ask yourself, which state of mind will be more helpful to you in this meeting? A calm, clear, flexible state of mind, or a fearful, overwhelmed and anxious one?"

It is important to be aware of our feelings and recognise when we are experiencing fear or anxiety, he says. "Give yourself permission to let go of the feelings of fear or anxiety by simply paying attention to your breath (entering and leaving through your nostrils ) instead of the fearful or anxious thoughts and feelings. This will become easier to do if you are regularly doing the first step to build resilience, your daily meditation practice. As we do, the waves of fear and anxiety will gradually settle, and we will establish an inner calm, clarity, openness, and flexibility in our mind, to patiently accept and work with the outer problem (for example, the meeting ) to the best of our ability."

Each time we meditate, we boost our resilience, our ability to bounce back from adversity, he says. "We also undermine our tendency towards fear and anxiety. For example, if I can accept and be at peace with the challenges I meet today, I know I can also do that more and more day-to-day. Simply, I stop worrying and feeling anxious about what might happen tomorrow so much, when I know I can accept and work with whatever comes up today."

Kadam Adam will give a course entitled "Calming the Anxious Mind, Building Resilience" at the Connacht Hotel on Saturday, October 5 from 10am to 1pm. Online booking in advance is recommended at www.meditateinireland.com/galway Admission is €25 and there is a concession fee of €18 for students, the unemployed, and senior citizens.

Tara Kadampa Meditation Centre also runs a weekly class at the Connacht Hotel every Wednesday night from 7pm to 8.15pm. You can book online or just attend on the night. Admission is €10 and €7 (concession rate ).

 

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